Finding the kid in me

I saw my new therapist today and I loved her. We got to know each other and see told me she can tell I'm a playful person. Years ago I used to love to play like a kid, but I've forgotten that fun side of me. A few weeks back all 4 of our kids were wet, muddy and having a great time. It was so typical of us. I let the kids get dirty and have fun, but not nearly as often as before.
Also she told me I'm a highly sensitive person, not sensitive in feelings (even though I am that too) but sensitive with my 5 senses, which is so true. She gave me some reading suggestions. One of the books talks about how to survive when the world overwhelms you. That is so me. Reading out of a book has been such a struggle for me since my stoke. I have to cover up the other page and part of the page I'm on, or I get overwhelmed by all the lines and letters. I'm going to figure out a way to read these because I know they could really help me.
After my appointment I walked to another building to check out a business. It felt and smelled amazing being outside. I loved it. It had rained and it was wet and man it smelled so good. I need to get outside more.
I'm going to see her weekly for a while to work through my stress, not just from my stroke, but from all the things we've gone through.
Just last week I asked Johann why do we have to have so many hard things happen to our family. Why can't we have it easier? Why do so many trails and struggles come to us? He didn't have an answer, but he understands where I'm coming from.
I think all the stressful things that have come our way have taken the playful spontaneous spirit out of me. I need to find that side of me and encourage it to come back out. I like to run, ride bikes, roller blade, play in the mud, make sand castles, swing high into the sky, climb rocks and hills, have picnics, go to zoo's and waterparks. I need to find the kid in me again. I know finding the kid in me again will help me feel more alive.
She suggested doing a mud run when I'm fully recovered. I would LOVE to do a mud run.

It's time to find the spontaneous fun loving kid in me again!